You Know You Are a Serb When...
- Added by youknowster, October 3, 2008 at 3:09am.
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Top 10 Reasons You Know You Are a Serb:
- Your mother insists that "promaja" will kill you15 up, 5 down
- When your Dad tries to make you dring "Rasola" (kupus juice), and tries desparately to convince you how good it is!12 up, 3 down
- Your uncle makes his own wine that is stronger than rakija10 up, 3 down
- You get mad when somebody says that you speak Yugoslavian13 up, 6 down
- Your Baba calls all cereal "Corn Flakes".12 up, 6 down
- You think everything is a conspiracy10 up, 4 down
- When your friends' parents talk to you like they're YOUR PARENTS too.8 up, 2 down
- You know you're Serbian when all you have to do is sniffle and your parents (almost gladly) say, "Uh- huh" and start yelling at you for getting sick7 up, 1 down
- Your dad starts to swear obsessively whenever he watches CNN.8 up, 3 down
- All other action stops when you hear the music : "Boze Pravde", "Kad sam bio mali", or "Marsirala"7 up, 2 down
More about "Serb"
Serbs are a South Slavic people living in the Balkans and Central Europe, mainly in Serbia, Montenegro, Bosnia-Herzegovina, and, to a lesser extent, in Croatia.[+] Post a Comment
More reasons You Know You Are a Serb
- When you are 6'5" 250# and your parents think you are too skinny.6 up, 1 down
- When your dad tells you not to drink so much, but he drinks non stop5 up, 0 down
- Your Baba can only cook in quantities of 20.10 up, 5 down
- Your father calls you a "dummy" for not knowing how to do something he can't either.7 up, 3 down
- You work out six days a week, but somehow you dad whoops your ass in like five seconds after he comes home from a thirteen hour day from the bakery/factory/food business.6 up, 2 down
- Your mother insists that you must eat something with "kasika" at least several times a week7 up, 3 down
- Your American friends will never understand why you spend so much time at church events and you are the farthest thing from holy that there is6 up, 2 down
- Your parents praise the country they came from but would never move back.5 up, 1 down
- You own a leather jacket.4 up, 1 down
- You are prohibited from speaking English in you own home.5 up, 2 down
- There's at least one relative that your family refuses to talk to.6 up, 3 down
- You only go out of town for Serbian Tournaments and Dances5 up, 2 down
- At your birthdays everyone is singing "Happy brzday tu u"9 up, 6 down
- When returning from Jugo, everyone at the airport is staring at you becuase your suitcase smells of rakija6 up, 3 down
- After a few years of working there is a pattern on your leave of absence, you are sick every year on the 7th, 14th, and 20th of January4 up, 1 down
- When your date comes to pick you up and your dad sits on the couch cleaning his hunting gun5 up, 2 down
- Upon meeting another Serb, one of your first questions is, "What church do You go to?"3 up, 0 down
- You tell Americans where you are from and you end up explaining the entire history of Yugoslavia4 up, 1 down
- You get a C in history, but can recite every Serbian king, in order,from Czar Dusan8 up, 6 down
- At your wedding the first song is always "danas majka zeni svoga sina".5 up, 3 down
- Your Deda cuts the grass with knee high black socks and slippers.5 up, 3 down
- Every car your family owns has chrome wheels.5 up, 3 down
- Your dad thinks that the phone is bugged4 up, 2 down
- You eat canned peppers and ajvar with every meal4 up, 2 down
- You have a Kosovka Devojka goblen hanging on your wall4 up, 2 down
- When your friends can't believe you got drunk at a church function7 up, 5 down
- Your tata has a smoke house and smokes all the slanina/prsut/pecenje for the surrounding serb colony6 up, 4 down
- "Everyone is sure that you're Italian or Greek"5 up, 3 down
- "Your Baba lectures you everyday of your life because her own children know better than to listen to her"5 up, 3 down
- You know you're Serbian, when you are a fan of whatever basketball team Vlade Divac is on3 up, 1 down
- When you can always smell garlic on your parents breath and they insist it kills all the bacteria.3 up, 1 down
- Your parents still prefer to buy cassettes instead of CDs.3 up, 1 down
- When your tata is talking to you and every other word he calls you is budala...3 up, 1 down
- When your tata whips you before your relatives come over for your birthday...3 up, 1 down
- When your baba and deda believe that you got sick because your parents didn't feed you properly5 up, 3 down
- You get scared when your dad sneezes4 up, 2 down
- When you insist on talking Serbian even when you're with your American friends6 up, 4 down
- When no one enters your house through the front door. .. everyone is to enter through the garage3 up, 1 down
- Garlic flavored boiled pigs feet spread is yummy4 up, 2 down
- When you eat any kind of meat for lunch and your baba says that the greasiest part is the sweetest.6 up, 4 down
- When you say bitch instead of beach or beach instead of bitch5 up, 3 down
- When you roll pancakes and eat them as a dessert after dinner3 up, 1 down
- The tunes of your popular folk songs sound oriental3 up, 1 down
- Your parents tell you that sleeping in a cold bedroom is good for your health3 up, 1 down
- Your easter eggs are coloured brown3 up, 1 down
- if your not married by the age of 20 your family wants to send you back home to find ?a nice boy?3 up, 1 down
- Asian people are friends with your dad because he's name is Dragan. And they think it's Dragon3 up, 1 down
- There is always "pita" on the kitchen counter and multiple pita dough bundles in your freezer at all times3 up, 1 down
- A healthy Serbian breakfast is fried eggs, slanina, pogacha and a shot of slivo or rakja. Your deda has been eating this for years and has the lowest cholesterol count in the family.4 up, 2 down
- A Serb girl tries to look 23 but she's actually 15.5 up, 4 down
- Your mother still makes your bed.4 up, 3 down
- Your Baba and Deda live in your basement.3 up, 2 down
- Your dad thinks he knows everything about the world today.3 up, 2 down
- When you are reading this list and you're cracking up3 up, 2 down
- The minute Church services are finished you run to the bar in the Church Hall and get plastered5 up, 4 down
- If you are female, you first name ends in "A"3 up, 2 down
- You base your whole life on the fortune in your coffee cup3 up, 2 down
- You live with your mom and dad until you are married3 up, 2 down
- There's a slab of fat in your fridge called "slanina"4 up, 3 down
- You have a freezer that is loaded with meat products, especially pork.4 up, 3 down
- When your Mom proclaims that she doesn't gossip about other Serbs but full well knows that she does2 up, 1 down
- Whenever you went by Baba's house, she offered you supa, sarma, pecenje or kolace and got mad if you didn't eat EVERYTHING.2 up, 1 down
- You live for the annual Folkfest and/or Soccer Tournament2 up, 1 down
- "Your Baba says everything you do is bad and what you need is a nice Serbian girl to take care of you!"3 up, 2 down
- You know you're Serbian when you don't work and you go shell out $300 easy on the weekend3 up, 2 down
- When your Baba made you drink warm water when you had a cold, because cold water would make you feel sicker3 up, 2 down
- A Serbian baby shower is as big as most American weddings!3 up, 2 down
- When no matter how old you are, your parents say you are never right.2 up, 1 down
- When you say you're hungry, and then go buy pack of smokes2 up, 1 down
- When your baba chases you down the street with her cipela...4 up, 3 down
- When your tata tells you a narodna poslovica for everything single wrong thing you do and you think that he made them all up just to prove a point.2 up, 1 down
- When your parents will only go to the doctor if they are passed out on the floor or have severed a limb4 up, 3 down
- When beans are served and your dad tells you that you should call it "gospodin pasulj2 up, 1 down
- You know you are Serb when your boyfriend / husband says to you "cut bre"2 up, 1 down
- You cut up some onions and garlic and then decide what you will make for dinner.2 up, 1 down
- You think the expression "Don't laugh so much, you will cry" sounds reasonable2 up, 1 down
- Your majka is fond of saying "Tanks God"3 up, 2 down
- Deda has a 25 year club hat and license plate frame from his steel mill job and lost three fingers achieving that milestone2 up, 1 down
- You work on a construction, but when you come to YU for vacation you tell everyone how successfull "biznismen" you are.4 up, 3 down
- When your mom can bake a cake without sugar, chocolate, flour and oil, and she calls it " the embargo cake "2 up, 1 down
- You have a gold chain with a 'pravoslavni krst' on it2 up, 1 down
- When you try to spell and it comes out the way you speak it2 up, 1 down
- You are poor in the United States, but when you go back to Yugo everyone thinks you are rich.3 up, 2 down
- You think this list is way too long but have already read to the bottom because it's so funny2 up, 1 down
- For the first 16 years of your life you think your name is J.... Ti Sunce'3 up, 2 down
- When your Dad insists that he must be called Tata and not Dad because to him Dad means Deda2 up, 1 down
- You know you are born in Australia, America, UK etc but the first words out of your mouth is Serbian and not English2 up, 1 down
- At your christening a silver dollar on your navel will protect you from evil and make you rich2 up, 1 down
- Seeing an animal's brain in the fridge doesn't freak you out2 up, 1 down
- When the only family u have here is your mom dad and siblings3 up, 2 down
- You coverted the garage into a kitchen just to feed all the family and guest that showed5 up, 4 down
- When your tata is looking at an old photo album and sees himself young and says "jao sto sam bio frajer" and ur mom tells him "molim te nemoj da s...?!"2 up, 1 down
- You have an ashtray in your shower2 up, 1 down
- When your tata, ujko, stric, tetak, or deda cross their legs like a woman3 up, 2 down
- When you're about 4 years old and you have to show your "cuna" to some old Serb who gives you one dollar and is pleased to see that you are becoming a man.2 up, 1 down
- When people are readig this list and they are serious in analyzing each line, contemplating its truth in depth and giving it a historical perspective2 up, 1 down
- When everyone likes kolo's.2 up, 1 down
- You dance folklor... or if you're a guy your mom makes you2 up, 1 down
- When your dad has a ton of yarn socks from Serbia2 up, 1 down
- Your MySpace page has a hundred photos with you and your friends holding up three fingers2 up, 1 down
- You rip the hleb and eat it dry.2 up, 1 down
- You must wear papucas (slippers) at all times so you don't catch cold5 up, 4 down
- Your 15 year old sister can out-drink any Amerikanac2 up, 2 down
- All christenings have the cuisine "supa, sarma, Pecenje".2 up, 2 down
- A cold shiver runs down your spine when your mom threatens by using the word "tata" in a sentence.3 up, 3 down
- You wear a DKNY t-shirt when you work out.3 up, 3 down
- You argue that your mobile phone is better than anyone else's.2 up, 2 down
- Your parents have gone on vacation ONCE and it was to Yugo.3 up, 3 down
- You have black hair and brown eyes3 up, 3 down
- One of your relatives is a construction worker / painter3 up, 3 down
- Your dad pronounced the silent b in Climb, plumber, comb etc?4 up, 4 down
- There is a baba hotline 1-800-CALL-BABA2 up, 2 down
- As a kid you are paid to steal the bride's shoe at a wedding2 up, 2 down
- When your baba will not accept the fact that you're not hungry2 up, 2 down
- When you had/have a pet named Mishko.2 up, 2 down
- When you're an adult and still recieve Easter chocolate2 up, 2 down
- Your tata pronounces "oops" as "ups."2 up, 2 down
- When your mum cuts your hair with a "serpa"2 up, 2 down
- When your parents know everything you did at the basketball tournament before you get home2 up, 2 down
- You go to church 2 times a year... Bozic and Uskrs2 up, 2 down
- When you hang your clothes in the backyard on a clothes line even though you have a dryer...2 up, 2 down
- You always have the latest mobile phone on the market2 up, 2 down
- When you believe the most famous people in the world are Serbs who changed their name2 up, 2 down
- Thinking there's no such thing as Santa Claus but believing St Nicholas will come to your house2 up, 2 down
- When your father says "samo ako te zgrabim ja"3 up, 3 down
- Baba's extra refrigerator is the back porch...2 up, 2 down
- Your parents order "Pepsi , no ice"2 up, 2 down
- Theres a bust of Cica Draza in your house and a hand made afghan on your recliner2 up, 2 down
- A week after Slava, Bozic, and Easter you are still eating sarma2 up, 2 down
- You read this list to your mama and tata and all they have to say in their defense is "IC NAT TRU!!!"2 up, 2 down
- When you're sitting in your room and listening to "narodnjake"2 up, 2 down
- When your mama and baba have to wear 18 lbs. of gold around their necks at the zabavas "zato sto narod moze da vidi koliko smo mi bogat!"2 up, 2 down
- When you've been called djubre at least once in your life2 up, 2 down
- Your parents buy peppers by the bushels3 up, 3 down
- ..if you sit too close to the T.V., you'll get cancer.2 up, 2 down
- Your parents insist that piling blankets on your body is the way to cure your 102 degree fever2 up, 2 down
- When you think green onions from your deda's garden and a plate of salt is an appetizer2 up, 2 down
- Your house smells like luk or krompir and you get pissed because it gets on your clothes3 up, 3 down
- When you started going to the clubs at 142 up, 2 down
- You tell your friends to rebel when their parents tell them to be home before midnight2 up, 2 down
- You've either thrown a hotel party or have gotten thrown out of one2 up, 2 down
- You know you are a Serb when you're mom is running after you to put on a "podkusulja"2 up, 2 down
- When a lamb/pig was roasted on a backyard pit for your graduation party to the horror of your friends2 up, 2 down
- You know you're a Serb when you sing "DJURDJEVDAN" at all serbian parties2 up, 2 down
- Your dad tells you "dis is the turd time I am telling you dis" and you are afraid to laugh.2 up, 2 down
- All your male relatives in the Old Country have a three day growth of beard, smell of onions and B.O., and leave saliva on your cheeks when they kiss you.2 up, 2 down
- You have a doily covering your DVD, VCR, printer, scanner2 up, 2 down
- When you think there is no better thing in the world but to dip bread in the lard dripping from a roasted pig2 up, 2 down
- When there is a knock on the front door and your father asks: Who is?"2 up, 2 down
- When you?re BABA doesn?t want to eat Pizza because it has an AWFUL name.2 up, 2 down
- When you make sure that every non-Serb KNOWS that while at the English court they were eating with hands King LAZAR was using a golden fork2 up, 2 down
- When the hospitality is consisting in making the guest eat till he doesn't die2 up, 2 down
- When your tata is ironing, cooking cleaning and cooking, but when the doorbell rings, you must not open till he doesn?t put himself on the sofa with a cigarette and a turska kafa2 up, 2 down
- When people still think you are from Siberia no matter how many times you tell them Serbia2 up, 2 down
- Your mother serves you tea only when you are sick2 up, 2 down
- Your favorite phrase is "Nema problema"2 up, 2 down
- Every letter you receive from Yugo ends with "Posalji malo para"2 up, 2 down
- You're told to speak Serbian to be understood by the whole world2 up, 2 down
- No matter what the price is your Dad will still say 'kol'ko?,.., ooh, bogati, pa skupo' and 'Nasta trosis pare'.3 up, 3 down
- When everyone in Yugoslavia asks you "pa de ti se vise svidja? tamo ili ovamo?"2 up, 2 down
- Your mama tells you never to cut out the "srce" of a watermelon, but the whole slice or "tata ce da vice kada dodje kuci!"2 up, 2 down
- When 3 different strangers are waiting for you at the airport to collect their gifts that you are carrying with you2 up, 2 down
- When your Deda always says "Dodji Dedi"2 up, 2 down
- When you're at a soccer game and your tata is yelling "j**** ja" at the whole team and all the "amerikanci" know it can't be a good thing2 up, 2 down
- When your family suggests that u go to Yugo to marry your cousin so u can bring them over to Canada2 up, 2 down
- You have a good husband if he works and doesn't beat you2 up, 2 down
- Baba says "palachinki" and everyone heads for the table2 up, 2 down
- When your tata does a running commentary through a movie and he thinks he knows everything that's going to happen even though he has never seen the movie3 up, 3 down
- When you are in a circle of fellow Serbs having a conversation and anything round dropped into the middle of the group becomes a soccer ball subject to juggling2 up, 2 down
- When you actually know what it means when Peja Stojakovic holds up three fingers2 up, 2 down
- Your tata yells at you "budala, neznas nista!" when you tell him that the crowd isn't yelling "DIVAC", they are actually yelling "Defense" during the Sacramento Kings game regardless if they are home or away2 up, 2 down
- Your mom or baba only use two settings on the stove: MAX or OFF2 up, 2 down
- When you call Santa "Deda Mraze"2 up, 2 down
- When at your wedding reception as you enter the hall, they play "Marsh Na Drinu".2 up, 2 down
- You've convinced all your friends that Bon Jovi's name is actually Bojan Jovic2 up, 2 down
- When your tata chases the pigeons off the balcony with a mop, then sits down and says "dayll be back"2 up, 2 down
- When your pit bull's name is Pedja2 up, 2 down
- As a child, the babas at your church caused you permanent brain damage from asphyxiation by pressing your face into their ample boobs while shouting, "o joj, zlato!" over and over again2 up, 2 down
- Your parents spend hours talking about the best djubre for the vegetables2 up, 2 down
- Your deda tells you that his family were the wealthiest in the village because they owned two cows and a donkey2 up, 2 down
- You are the only race that suffers from PROMAJA3 up, 3 down
- If u use "bre" or "j___ g_" in your dialog2 up, 2 down
- If your parents think that Yugos are the best, and the whole world is just stupid2 up, 2 down
- If your parents can't pronounce "turtle"2 up, 2 down
- You believe drinking the juice from the kupus barrel is as good as a flu shot.2 up, 2 down
- When your mom makes you put on a sweater in the house because SHE's cold.2 up, 2 down
- When you know the biggest killer of Serbs isn't heart disease or cancer, but PROMAJA.2 up, 2 down
- When your neighbors think your garage is on fire, but it's just your Dad smoking meat.2 up, 2 down
- When every wedding you go to the kolo is always cacak2 up, 2 down
- When people at weddings shout like mad people2 up, 2 down
- Tata and brat drive 75 mph with one finger on the wheel and no seat belt while smoking and telling a story2 up, 2 down
- Mama knocks on wood when saying "Hvala Bogu"2 up, 2 down
- Your relatives are constantly trying to hook you up with some Balkan person they know2 up, 2 down
- Deda drinks rakija to "clear his throat" in the morning2 up, 2 down
- When your baba does all the household chores2 up, 2 down
- When you need something you're dad asks right away, "sta ti treba to?"2 up, 2 down
- You started smoking when you went to Serbia for the first time.2 up, 2 down
- When you translate for your father at court but he answers the judge in English2 up, 2 down
- You know your Serbian when your parents....relatives...... and most of all Grandparents incourage you to drink.... and if you back away they make fun of you.2 up, 2 down
- Your dad is out in the backyard with a large bowl or plastic bag and cutting dandelion leaves with a knife to put in the salata.2 up, 2 down
- Your family owns a coffee grinder..and a nut grinder1 up, 2 down
- You have 17 consonants and 2 vowels in your last name1 up, 2 down
- Your dad never told you about the birds and the bees2 up, 3 down
- At your wedding you have a minimum of 350 guests.2 up, 3 down
- You have at least 3 slave to attend to on the same day.2 up, 3 down
- All slave have the same cuisine "supa, sarma, Pecenje".1 up, 2 down
- At least one of your friends name is "Dragan".2 up, 3 down
- You are somehow related to every 1 in 3 Serb girls/boys.1 up, 2 down
- You can derive "Steve" from "Nenad".1 up, 2 down
- You can derive "David" from "Zeljko".2 up, 3 down
- You can derive "Mark" from "Mirko".1 up, 2 down
- Even the fat Serb chicks put on the tightest skirt possible.1 up, 2 down
- Your father expects you to study or "hit da books" every waking hour that he's home, and he expects nothing less than an "A".2 up, 3 down
- You have three pairs of black shoes.3 up, 4 down
- There is a 120-gallon barrel of wine and Cabbage in your garage.2 up, 3 down
- There is more alcohol in your liquor cabinet than at the local bar.1 up, 2 down
- You are 18 years old but your parents still call you by your brother's name.1 up, 2 down
- Your dad wears black socks to work everyday.2 up, 3 down
- You have all brand new appliances in your kitchen but your mom cooks in the basement with the stove from your old house.1 up, 2 down
- Your dad claims not to be a racist but insists the whole world should speak Serbian.2 up, 3 down
- Before school every morning your parents had to look after the sheep, milk the cows, gather all hay, feed the animals etc..1 up, 2 down
- Both your parents had to walk to school barefoot in the snow, 5km uphill both ways. And over rocks.1 up, 2 down
- Your parents can't pronounce "Thursday".1 up, 2 down
- Your mum makes her own bread and slices it with a BIG kitchen knife to a thickness of 5cm per slice.1 up, 2 down
- Your dad wears dress socks with tennis shoes.2 up, 3 down
- Each one of your friends has a distinct, annoying laugh.1 up, 2 down
- There's oil stains on your driveway.1 up, 2 down
- You had to break off a tree branch from your back yard, so your dad could whoop your ass with it.2 up, 3 down
- Your mom uses lard instead of Crisco to fry eggs. ..... and tells you it's good for you1 up, 2 down
- When you are hopelessly trying to bring the Serbian community together1 up, 2 down
- Your church has a fully loaded bar1 up, 2 down
- The main menu for lunch is cabbage and beans.1 up, 2 down
- A loaf of bread is eaten for lunch.2 up, 3 down
- You don't want to have or do any business with Serbs.1 up, 2 down
- You started to drink at the age of 122 up, 3 down
- You don't talk to your Kumovi1 up, 2 down
- Your mom wears her bra as a bathing suit2 up, 3 down
- You have a pair of wool slippers that your baba knit1 up, 2 down
- You wear as much gold as your girlfriend/mother/sister1 up, 2 down
- When the head of a pig with an apple in its mouth is looked upon as a delicacy1 up, 2 down
- You teach all your American friends Serbian cuss words1 up, 2 down
- When all your Serbian friend's dads offer you slivo at age 16.1 up, 2 down
- Your Tata complains da ga ledga BOLE!!!1 up, 2 down
- Your parents pronounce three, thirteen and thirty three as tri, tirteen, and tirty tree.2 up, 3 down
- You have a vegetable garden in your backyard consisting of a variety of peppers, onions and tomatoes.1 up, 2 down
- You have a cold cellar that includes a variety of meat/deli products,pickled goods, and wine.1 up, 2 down
- When your parents constantly say you'll end up a nobody if you don't graduate from University2 up, 3 down
- You go to a restaurant and you bring your own drinks1 up, 2 down
- You are at a zabava and guy's try to pick you up with "Hey baby, what's your slava??"2 up, 3 down
- You can think of nothing you would rather do an a Saturday night than go to a dance1 up, 2 down
- Whenever you kiss somebody, you kiss them 3 times.1 up, 2 down
- When your grandma says that farting is healthy.2 up, 3 down
- You are freaked out by 'Babaroga'1 up, 2 down
- You took a bath in a lavor when you were a kid.1 up, 2 down
- All the older Serbs around you are always worried about drafts.1 up, 2 down
- You have opanke hanging from your rear view mirror1 up, 2 down
- You cant imagine hearing a song without the obligatory "harmonikas solo"1 up, 2 down
- You use Shljivovitca down the carburetor to start your 69 Dodge Charger on a cold winter morning1 up, 2 down
- You know you are a Serb when you can hear your parents talking, and you are across the street.1 up, 2 down
- "You're the first of your friends to get hair on his back, and grey hair to follow"1 up, 2 down
- "Your Baba wastes absolutley no food and even sticks flour in the freezer to keep fresh"1 up, 2 down
- You know you're Serbian when your mom has a whole pharmacy in the medicine cabinet.1 up, 2 down
- When your mum calls you "stoka"2 up, 3 down
- When your mom tells you not to drink cold water after you have exercisedyou know1 up, 2 down
- When no matter what age you are or how much smarter than your parents you are, they will never listen to what you say 'cause you're still their little " beba "1 up, 2 down
- When your friends can't understand why your summer vacation consists of playing golf in a town called Farrell or Aliquippa.1 up, 2 down
- You know you're a Serb when your neighbors never see you during Memorial Day Weekend because you're traveling with 'that choir'.1 up, 2 down
- When all guys balk at the idea of meeting you family, especially the male relatives1 up, 2 down
- Your Dad tells you "kad sam ja bio u tvoje godine...."2 up, 3 down
- When you are a eating at the kitchen table with your family and you get in trouble for talking.1 up, 2 down
- You sport the latest Nike and Adidas outfits but have never exercised in your life1 up, 2 down
- You can spend 3hrs in a Cafe drinking the same one coffee1 up, 2 down
- Calling someone for a chat at 1am on a weeknight is the norm1 up, 2 down
- Your parents work day and night to build the ultimate brick and concrete mansion so their sin and snaja can live with them in eternal happiness1 up, 2 down
- When everytime your family needs to buy a household item, your father asks the salesperson "how much for cash" and continues to bargain down for at least half an hour2 up, 3 down
- Your parents believe that being left handed is the sign of the devil1 up, 2 down
- When as a young boy/girl you have your head shaved to promote a thick head of healthy hair3 up, 4 down
- As soon as you tell a neighbour you're Serb they ask you for some rakija1 up, 2 down
- When at least 3 of your cousins are Cro2 up, 3 down
- When on your birthday everyone pulls your ears2 up, 3 down
- When your baba chases you around the house with a varjaca1 up, 2 down
- When your parents call you "sine" no matter if your a boy or a girl.1 up, 2 down
- A cassette or Video of Lepa Brena is in your Video case or radio2 up, 3 down
- Your parents always complain about how the "matematika" you're doing in school is too easy for kids your age.2 up, 3 down
- When you open gifts not to tear the wrapping so your baba can reuse the paper and bows1 up, 2 down
- When you write on your history exam that Nikola Tesla is the father of electricity not Thomas Edison and you teacher fails you.2 up, 3 down
- When you make a pilgrimage to Chicago1 up, 2 down
- When your parents tell you that the laws pertain only to North Amaericans and not them1 up, 2 down
- When all your Serb guy friends insist they're Cetnici2 up, 3 down
- When you go on vacation and your dad spends all his time playing tablic at the hotel2 up, 3 down
- When tipping rule of thumb is: no need to tip if you will never eat at that restaurant again1 up, 2 down
- When your cat is named matcak and your dog is named kutcak2 up, 3 down
- When the first thing you do when you walk into a friends house, is take off your shoes, kiss their mom, and shake their dad's hand1 up, 2 down
- When you beg a friend going back to Yugo to get you some Serbian cigarettes1 up, 2 down
- When your father threatens you with a papuca1 up, 2 down
- You know you're a Serb when this list keeps growing and it's getting hard to edit it!1 up, 2 down
- You can't even think about beginning the kolach until 1:00 in the morning, since it's bad luck to make it any earlier than the morning of slava.It's 2:10 AM when you realize the oven, which deda just "repaired", won't light...1 up, 2 down
- Your first real kiss was during the Kissing Kolo.1 up, 2 down
- The word "Sramota!" will deter you from anything2 up, 3 down
- Every one of your relatives from the old country that immigrates to the the US is an engineer2 up, 3 down
- You can dance a kolo to anything, including Serbian rock1 up, 2 down
- You feel nostalgic for drinking and vomiting in front of the liquor store.1 up, 2 down
- When your mom does your laundry and makes your bed1 up, 2 down
- When your american friends come to your party and beg for you to play something in english1 up, 2 down
- You know you're a Serb when you refer to John Travolta as "Jontra"1 up, 2 down
- When you are never certain whether to stay abroad or return to Serbia1 up, 2 down
- Reunions are not complete without dissension and the airing of grievances.1 up, 2 down
- You are adored the first 10 years of your life, then treated like a complete idiot until you get married.1 up, 2 down
- You have no idea why the other girls in second grade are so upset when you tell them you eat lamb2 up, 3 down
- When you were a kid you made enough money for any electronic toy you wanted every time you saw your older relatives2 up, 3 down
- You make sure to bring pictures of your new car/apartment/house with you to YU and show them to your jealous relatives & friends but make it look unintentional1 up, 2 down
- When you know what "merak" is and spread your arms every single time you hear "Nema raje bez rodnoga kraja"1 up, 2 down
- When your tata never misses to "oglodati oko kosti"1 up, 2 down
- When your pride is more important than your own happiness2 up, 3 down
- When you say your last name first and prefer last names that ends in "ic"1 up, 2 down
- When you?re BABA is criticizing you every time you say the word "picture"!1 up, 2 down
- When you say that the family is to be loved only in the photos1 up, 2 down
- When you meet someone special and the first question you ask is "imas li papire?"1 up, 2 down
- When your parents' friends have no shame to tell you that you gained weight2 up, 3 down
- You don't understand the language of your church prayers1 up, 2 down
- When you're going away for the weekend with your girlfriend/boyfriend and your mama and baba tell you to buy some nice pyjamas and underwear1 up, 2 down
- When you put a pound of butter and a pound of cream cheese on your bagel, then fold it in half.1 up, 2 down
- When you have pictures of saints in your bathroom1 up, 2 down
- Your parents insists on you dancing the kolo from an early age and can't leave it till they had enough taking you to lessons and that is usually around 16 years of age.1 up, 2 down
- When you call the youngest child in your family Bato and don't use their real name1 up, 2 down
- When your deda drives a Yugo1 up, 2 down
- When relatives immigrate from Yugo, they live at your house for 6 months first1 up, 2 down
- When you can actually pronounce the "g" in jagnje1 up, 2 down
- When your Tata always says "Dodji Tati"1 up, 2 down
- Your parents tell you that "gurlz" love guys that can dance a good kolo2 up, 3 down
- You have more than 200 serbian movies, but you have never watched them1 up, 2 down
- When she is mad your mama tells you that she will send you back to where you came from1 up, 2 down
- When you put ground potatoes in your socks to cure a fever1 up, 2 down
- When you mom or grandma tells you to pee before you go outside1 up, 2 down
- You know when you are a Serb when you are born on a Serbian Saint Day and named after that saint.. eg Nicola, Lazer, Savo etc..2 up, 3 down
- When tata allways "AMMA YOY"1 up, 2 down
- You are named after your ujko, stric, tata or deda2 up, 3 down
- Your mother keeps buying and sending you clothes long after you have grown up and left home1 up, 2 down
- When you've heard "kuku meni" way too many times in your life ..2 up, 3 down
- When everytime you ask your Dad where he's going, he says; "U g____u. Oces li i ti?"1 up, 2 down
- When you have a stomach ache and your mom says "Skupi se"1 up, 2 down
- When you have a wrestling match against your dad your deda laughs.2 up, 3 down
- There is no wedding without a kolo2 up, 3 down
- Not only do you eat bread with every meal, but then you use the left-over bread to wipe your plate clean.2 up, 3 down
- When your real name is Nick/ Nikola, serbs call you Nidjo1 up, 2 down
- When a relative/friend comes from Serbia, they bring chocalate for the kids.2 up, 3 down
- When your dad buys a car he says it's a great car2 up, 3 down
- Your mom uses lard instead of Crisco to fry eggs.1 up, 3 down
- You drive a nicer car than your parents.1 up, 3 down
- You hear birds chirping and see the sun rise every time you come home from the bar.1 up, 3 down
- You can hear your dad snoring from across the street.1 up, 3 down
- Your dad carries around enough money to buy a car.1 up, 3 down
- Your parents never go on vacations because they are afraid to leave you home alone for a week.2 up, 4 down
- Your baba swears more than you do.1 up, 3 down
- You have the biggest sandwiches at school, always consisting of "prsut Or salami".1 up, 3 down
- When your walls are crowded with icons of saints3 up, 5 down
- Your last name ends with a CH1 up, 3 down
- When you make jokes based on your own tragedy1 up, 3 down
- You are high maintenance1 up, 3 down
- Your parents have a shot of rakija for breakfast1 up, 3 down
- You have a Serbian cross, flag, or icon, hanging from your rear view mirror1 up, 3 down
- If you are a girl and not married by the age of 20 you are an old maid1 up, 3 down
- Your mom tells you not to sit on concrete or your ovaries are going to freeze1 up, 3 down
- On your birthday, your parents make you take a picture cutting the cake with a huge knife.1 up, 3 down
- Your dad washes the garage floor with the hose wearing cheap criss-cross brown flip-flops.1 up, 3 down
- Rakija is used to cure all illnesses, celebrate all occasions and as a massage lotion1 up, 3 down
- When you celebrate Christmas and Easter and New Year two weeks after everyone else1 up, 3 down
- When you have to reassure your Mother that her cooking is the best1 up, 3 down
- When you had to go perform as an altar boy1 up, 3 down
- When you are told that you'll grow a tail if you drink coffee at a young age1 up, 3 down
- You hear the word "BATINE" and you cringe or go into convulsions1 up, 3 down
- The first conversation you had as a baby used the words "jebi ga"1 up, 3 down
- "No one has ever pronounced your last name right, and every kid on the block has a nickname for it"1 up, 3 down
- When your baba tells you that your deda is perfect but don't ask him anything.1 up, 3 down
- You have not seen baba's hair since deda died.1 up, 3 down
- When your mother yells at you for taking a shower each and every morning with her sarcasm "Did you plow the fields today?"1 up, 3 down
- When your baba rather walk five miles to the grocery store instead of getting a ride.1 up, 3 down
- When your mama gives you vodka when your teething...1 up, 3 down
- You have a shot of rakija followed by a crna kafa and a pack of Malboro's for breakfast.1 up, 3 down
- When your parents call relatives in Yugo they shout to be heard1 up, 3 down
- When you're married with kids and your mother still insists on cooking and cleaning for you1 up, 3 down
- When your parents only want to invite your Serbian friends in your house1 up, 3 down
- When your parents only let you go to your Serbian friends' house.1 up, 3 down
- Your mom gloats about how good Serbian food is but cooks Turkish coffee for all her friends1 up, 3 down
- When you work part time and drive a BMW1 up, 3 down
- When you are watching your favorite basketball team and someone scores a three pointer you interpret the referee's three fingers in the air as support for Serbia1 up, 3 down
- When you call your next door neighbor "kone"1 up, 3 down
- When you date someone from church1 up, 3 down
- When to ensure that you will never marry a non-serb, whenever you are in the car with your parents, your parents play Serb music and sing along really loud when the windows are rolled down in the car1 up, 3 down
- If your real first name isn't Serbian, you have two first names -- one is definitely Serbian.1 up, 3 down
- When you beg a friend going back to Yugo to get you some kajmak1 up, 3 down
- When you bang the table and break glasses while singing when you're drunk.1 up, 3 down
- Drinking a cold glass of water will get you sick1 up, 3 down
- Cevapcici on the grill are better than steak any day1 up, 3 down
- Your grown uncle gets a "batine" from your baba and you don't think twice about it1 up, 3 down
- You can hear Ceca pumping in your car, with the subs cranked to the max, two blocks away1 up, 3 down
- You understand what "made in the garage" really means1 up, 3 down
- When in the family gathering every generation has its own war and is boming to talk about and be proud for surviving it.1 up, 3 down
- You bring gifts when you come and take gifts when you leave.1 up, 3 down
- You know you're a Serb when your dad thinks everyone from China has a black belt1 up, 3 down
- When you have run away from Serbia and you?re still saying :It?s the best place to live!1 up, 3 down
- When working 9-5 is like working under fascism the first question you ask at a job interview is "how much vacation time do I have"1 up, 3 down
- When you watch a movie and wait to the end to see if there are any jugovic in the credits1 up, 3 down
- You move next door to a family member to be closer but then end up not talking for something stupid someone said when they were drunk1 up, 3 down
- Your Baba tells you to eat ice cream only in summertime1 up, 3 down
- You get phone calls from your relatives in Yugo at 3AM1 up, 3 down
- Everybody exept for your father serves the guests on "Slava"1 up, 3 down
- If you were taught to love not just your immediate family but up to your 10th cousin or more and NOT to marry them1 up, 3 down
- You're 14 and some 50 year old guy is trying to pick up on you at the hall1 up, 3 down
- When you pack to go for serbia and out of the 4 suitcases you are carrying, only one of them is actually yours1 up, 3 down
- When you tell people you are Serbian, they always ask... "So ... What is it like there now?"1 up, 3 down
- You live in the adult world but when you go home, you feel like your 9 years old all over again1 up, 3 down
- When your mother in law puts garlic under the cradle of your baby to save him from "uroka"1 up, 3 down
- When your baba complains about the mess but does not intend on doing anything about it1 up, 3 down
- When your mama tells you that the sweetest things on earth are luk and kiseli kupus