You know you're a Redneck if...
- Added by youknowster, August 31, 2008 at 12:41am.
- 0 comments
- 4135 views
Top 10 Reasons You know you're a Redneck:
- Three quarters of the clothes you own have LOGOS on them.19 up, 7 down
- You and your dog use the same tree.21 up, 10 down
- Someone asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle.17 up, 7 down
- You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.17 up, 9 down
- Your kids take a siphon hose to "Show and Tell."18 up, 10 down
- You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.20 up, 13 down
- You believe dual air bags refer to your wife and mother-in-law.15 up, 9 down
- Your aunt and your grandmother went to the funeral and had a fight over who gets to be the widow.14 up, 8 down
- You've played the horseshoe game with a toilet seat.18 up, 12 down
- Mailpouch sends you Christmas cards.16 up, 11 down
More about "Redneck"
Rednecks. You know who you are.[+] Post a Comment
More reasons You know you're a Redneck
- Your `huntin dawg' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.15 up, 10 down
- You can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.14 up, 9 down
- You think the last words to"The Star Spangled Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines."18 up, 14 down
- You think the OJ Trial was a Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.15 up, 11 down
- You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.13 up, 9 down
- You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.14 up, 10 down
- Your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.12 up, 8 down
- You think TACO BELL is the Mexican Phone Company.13 up, 10 down
- You got stopped by a state trooper. He asked you if you had an I.D. And you said, 'Bout What?'15 up, 12 down
- Your front porch collapses and four dogs git killed.13 up, 10 down
- You think fast food is hitting a possum at 65mph.13 up, 10 down
- You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.14 up, 11 down
- You use a weedeater in your living room.12 up, 9 down
- You have a rag for a gas cap.13 up, 10 down
- Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.14 up, 11 down
- Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.12 up, 9 down
- You think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood".14 up, 11 down
- You use a NASCAR credit card.13 up, 10 down
- YOUR IDEA OF HIGH-QUALITY ENTERTAINMENT IS A SIX-PACK AND A BUG-ZAPPER.13 up, 10 down
- You couldn't learn to swim because your gene pool is too small.14 up, 11 down
- You think Sherlock Holmes is a housing project down in Biloxi.11 up, 9 down
- You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.12 up, 10 down
- You have spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.13 up, 11 down
- You've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.12 up, 10 down
- to defend your sister's honor.13 up, 11 down
- Your pickup has a two-tone paint job -- primer red and primer gray.12 up, 10 down
- The beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.12 up, 10 down
- Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath."14 up, 12 down
- Your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.14 up, 13 down
- You think subdivision is part of a math problem.12 up, 11 down
- The people on Jerry Springer's show remind you of your neighbors.13 up, 12 down
- Your family tree has no forks.11 up, 10 down
- You consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.12 up, 11 down
- A seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.11 up, 10 down
- On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.15 up, 14 down
- It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.11 up, 10 down
- You believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.12 up, 11 down
- Your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.11 up, 11 down
- You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.12 up, 12 down
- You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl'.11 up, 11 down
- You were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 8-tracks.11 up, 11 down
- Your grandfather died and left everything to his widow.10 up, 10 down
- The third grade teacher says little Bubba could be a mathematical genius because he's got thirteen fingers.13 up, 13 down
- Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.11 up, 11 down
- You may have used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.12 up, 12 down
- "I'm not late on taking down my christmas lights, I'm just early putting them up!"11 up, 11 down
- Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction.12 up, 13 down
- If you can burp and say your name at the same time, you're shur'nuff a redneck.9 up, 10 down
- You think Possum is "The Other White Meat".9 up, 10 down
- The centerpiece on your dining room table is an original signed work by a famous taxidermist.10 up, 11 down
- You think there's nothing wrong with incest as long as you keep it in the family.9 up, 10 down
- You think watching professional wrestling is foreplay.13 up, 14 down
- But she can't touch it until she's fourteen.11 up, 12 down
- You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.11 up, 12 down
- You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.12 up, 13 down
- The blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.10 up, 11 down
- Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.11 up, 12 down
- During your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.10 up, 11 down
- The FBI surrounded your trailer park twice so far this year.10 up, 11 down
- On Thanksgiving Day you have to decide which pet to eat.11 up, 12 down
- you can call yer pastor fer help on skinning yer deer10 up, 11 down
- You hooked up with your present girlfriend as a result of a message on the wall of the mens' room at the Flying J Truck Stop.11 up, 13 down
- Your father executes the "pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.11 up, 13 down
- Your whole family is Democrats'cept little Mary. She lernt how to read.11 up, 13 down
- If you refer to the fifth grade as, "your senior year".9 up, 11 down
- The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.10 up, 12 down
- You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint9 up, 11 down
- You think the stock market has fence around it.11 up, 13 down
- Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater.10 up, 12 down
- "THE DAY MY SHIP CAME IN."10 up, 12 down
- Your brother-in-law is your uncle AND your grandfather.10 up, 12 down
- You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.11 up, 14 down
- You think safe sex is a padded headboard.9 up, 12 down
- You've ever had to scratch your sisters name out of a message that begins, "For a good time time call..."11 up, 14 down
- Fifth grade was the best six years of your life.11 up, 14 down
- You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.11 up, 14 down
- Down where you come from reruns of Hee Haw are called documentaries.11 up, 14 down
- You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.10 up, 13 down
- You just bought an 8-track player to put in your truck.10 up, 13 down
- You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.9 up, 12 down
- You think NASCAR stands for Non Athletic Sport Created Around Rednecks.11 up, 15 down
- You think the three primary colors are John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray.10 up, 14 down
- You're a lite beer drinker 'cause you start drinkin beer when it gets light.9 up, 13 down
- You own a homemade fur coat.8 up, 12 down
- Your parents met at a family reunion.8 up, 12 down
- You stare at an orange juice container because it says, "CONCENTRATE".9 up, 13 down
- Anyone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!".11 up, 15 down
- You think a quarter horse is a ride out in front of the Wal-Mart.7 up, 12 down
- You have a bumper sticker that says, "MY MOTHER'S AN HONOR STUDENT AT SOUTH LITTLE ROCK JR. HIGH."9 up, 14 down
- You take a six-pack cooler to church.10 up, 15 down
- One of your kids was born on a pool table.7 up, 12 down
- You've been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.9 up, 14 down
- You dated your daddy's current wife in high school.8 up, 13 down
- You think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.9 up, 15 down
- Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there is a law against it.9 up, 15 down
- Your entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the Governor to spare a loved one.8 up, 14 down
- Your huntin dawg had a litter of puppies in the living room and nobody noticed.7 up, 14 down
- YOU REFER TO THE TIME YOU WON A FREE CASE OF MOTOR OIL AS7 up, 14 down
- You think God looks a lot like Hank Williams, Jr., and heaven looks a lot like Daytona Beach, Florida.8 up, 16 down
- You have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.7 up, 15 down
- You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.7 up, 16 down
- You get all dressed up when going to Wal-Mart.7 up, 17 down
